I arrived the muritala Mohammed airport in ikeja
few hours earlier in order not to miss the Golden
opportunity of visiting my dream country for the
very first time. After few hours at the airport, it
was announced that the flight leaving Lagos to
the states might be canceled due to bad climate
condition- immediately It felt like my kidney
wanted to escape through my mouth, my bladder
instantly became full with heavy urine juice, I
became mentally and emotionally uncomfortable.
At this point my heart was already dancing in my
two hands, the suspense was broken when a
skinny young man came to inform the heavily
ranting crowd the weather is now suitable for
the aircraft, something heavy immediately left
my body, am sure my heart must have hugged
my lungs at that moment because I felt so
excited, suddenly I noticed my passport was
missing, "it must be the witches in my village
that are against me, I said to myself ", I became
totally confused has rainy cloud started gathering
in my eye, after searching far and wide I started
reminiscing how chinedu and John will mock me
if I miss the flight, in that low ebb state I felt a
tap on my shoulder, immediately I turned, I came
face to face with my lost sheep "my passport". I
became so happy I hugged the person so tight
without even knowing. After few seconds, I
regained consciousness then observed my good
Samaritan was an astonishing beautiful lady, my
heart skipped for a second after viewing the
natural resources she was endowed with, her
beauty can make one go back to the time of
Michael Faraday to get original electrical shock.
She wasn't interested in everything I had to say
until I stretched my hand for an handshake
saying " my name is Debo and you? With a lighter
face she replied saying " just add "rah" to your
name, that's my name", I calculated it quickly in
my brain "Deborah right?", she said "hundred
percent", we continued chatting until we got into
the plane, I discovered we had so many things in
common, we were both Lagosians, birthday
month and day " April first", even blood group
"AA" and so on.
Our conversation became really deep and
interesting has I made her laugh so hard, she
repeatedly told me she love my incredible sense
of humour, that line continously pulled my facial
strings.
She asked me if I heard about the Orlando
killings at the gay club, I said yes giving a
sympathetic look, she became really emotional
has she narrated how she visited the manager of
the gay club who was an old classmate few
minutes before the incident, suddenly tears
rapidly fell from her eye, has I watch thunder
strike heavily in them, it was really emotional for
me has she narrated the whole story.
We continued talking about other intimate issues,
I must confess! I was already drowning in love
with her.
At a point a crazily flavoured sausage was been
shared in the plane, Deborah gently careed the
sausage into her month " those sausage are so
lucky" I said to myself, Deborah's face changed
dramatically like she was fantasizing about
someone special has she chanted" I love salami
so much", My emotions dropped rapidly like an
heavy rain, I became mute for few minutes
before I replied saying " salami must be your
boyfriend right?" she started laughing really hard,
I felt really embarrassed when she said " salami
is the name of the sausage", my skin started
producing unlimited sweat, my body couldn't stop
the tears from within, meaning I was basically
thinking "salami is the name of one yoruba guy,
who his the chief commander of her armed
forces" I couldn't recover from that heavy blow
which kept me on a static admission.
The plane landed at the Atlanta airport of the
United States, Deborah gave me the address to
her apartment which was really close to my
uncle's apartment, I promised to visit her
immediately I drop my luggage.
I arrived the address given by Deborah, the
apartment in front of me was a gigantic mansion,
I wasn't sure I was at the right apartment until I
knocked the door", my eye dazzled has I watch
Deborah in a short white towel opened the door
in style, my emotions were awaken from a long
time dream, she welcomed and offered me a soft
wine, which I couldn't drink because my bladder
was too full, she said she was about dressing
before I came in.
My eye started speaking in tongues immediately
she said" fellow me to the bedroom ", the word"
bedroom" kept ringing in my mind, till I
discovered I was in Deborah's room, her room
was clothed in dim light with John legend's All of
me playing softly in background.
Deborah locked the door and went straight under
her bed sheet, I couldn't altar a word because
everything was unreal to me, I realized I wasn't
dreaming when she threw out her purple pant, my
emotions began to wander in unknown
wilderness, I didn't realize when I chanted
"meshach! sedrack!! and abenago!!! " I
immediately told Deborah I wanted to use the
restroom, I could feel the passion in her eye has
she told me to be quick in a Typical Nigerian
bedroom voice.
I spent more than seven minutes urinating
because my bladder was already too-full, has
Deborah kept screaming "babyyyyyy am waiting
q!" suddenly something I would never forget in
my life happened, I felt something really heavy
hit me on the head, I immediately opened my
eyes and observed I just finished urinating on my
mother and father's face while sleep walking. My
brother's and sister's after receiving massive
beating that day, traveling to America didn't ever
cross my mind again
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